Random Thoughts About the GRE

There's an odd symmetry here: I first took the GRE almost exactly twenty years ago.

However, now it's entirely different. In 1993, I took it on paper in a big lecture hall with a bunch of other people on the timer's schedule. In 2013, it's an adaptive, computer-based test that I took at my own pace (I skipped my ten minute break) at a cubicle with about five layers of security watching me. I had to wait about six weeks for my scores way back when, all the while having no idea how I did because it was the oddest standardized test I'd ever taken. Today, I got my scores as soon as I finished.

I was nervous/concerned about the reading comprehension parts, which I'd been having trouble with on the practice tests. But I studied and worked and kept practicing and got better. I was also nervous about the math.  But I could tell myself, "You've always done well on standardized tests. Relax!" and I did, mostly. This made me feel lots of compassion for people who don't test well or have test anxiety. Each negative experience reinforces the anxiety about testing. I really wish high-stakes testing was not part of our culture!

The person who escorted me to my cubicle motioned towards headphones and said they were for noise.  "Noise?" I thought. What noise? Umm, will there be four boys arguing in the background? Will a certain five year old be pitching his daily fit over nothing? Will the phone be ringing every five minutes with a telemarketer? Will Thor suddenly decide to chase Loki across the house, banging into things and knocking things down? Will daughters be interrupting me with urgent questions? Will the TV be blaring Pokémon in the background? No? Well then, there's no noise. Seriously? I think I can deal with hearing someone breathe and someone walk around to check I'm not cheating. Yeah, pretty sure.

In fact, taking the GRE was like taking a mini-vacation. Except my brain wasn't on vacation.  But I could sit there and concentrate and no one would interrupt me unless the building was in flames. NO ONE! I'm sorry but, DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW NICE THAT IS???? I sat in that chair for 4 hours. It was lovely. Especially when the test adjusted and gave me an easier second math section. It's better when I can actually understand what the question is asking.

I was elated when I figured out that I had scored in the 99th percentile for the verbal section. I had a 45 minute drive home and the first twenty minutes I was all, "Hey! I'm done earlier than I thought! I could stop at Target and buy that stuff for school! I could get a treat! I could...." and then the fatigue hit and I thought, "I stilllll have to drrrrriiiiveee twen.....tyyyyyy more....whatever those things are called....minnnnnnutes....home...."

But when I got home, I had two treats waiting for me: Beowulf (oldest son) was on the phone and...Kriemhildsdotter had made me brownies!!!!

On to the next phase of applying to graduate school!